I have had clinical depression for five years. The following are a
result of personal experiences; some good, and some bad. It all
starts with confusion about what depression really IS. Depression and
sadness are not the same thing. Everyone gets "the blues." Many
people refer to that as depression. It's really a misnomer. Depression is
a medical condition caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. When it
is seen in its true light, the following ideas are much easier to
understand. If you know someone who has been diagnosed with depression, or
if you know someone who exhibits the symptoms of depression, please keep
these tips in mind. You can't "fix" depression, but you can help
someone get through it and find the help they need.
1. Don't say "it'll be okay." To an individual with
depression, it will NOT be okay. Not ever. The fact that you say it will
be okay when we know it won't totally destroys your credibility. It also
minimizes our pain.
2. Don't say "I understand." Even if you've been diagnosed with
depression yourself, you can't possibly "understand" another
persons pain unless you've lived their entire life to that point. When I'm
in a depressed state, I'll quickly point out the ways your life is
different from mine, and I can get pretty angry. I might just shut down
totally. On the flip side, I've been in a depressed state at times when my
life is totally perfect and problem free. If you've never been depressed,
you can't possibly understand the feeling of wanting to die when your life
is, for all intents and purposes, wonderful.
3. Don't hesitate to ask if a depressed loved one has been taking their
medication. If things get really bad, you might be the one to talk to the
doctor. You'll need to know what has and has not been taken. Don't get
angry if they say no. Offer to go get them their medication and a nice
glass of water. Don't lecture. We know we're supposed to take it.
Reminding us that we're to blame for our situation because we chose not to
swallow the pill every morning does not help. Read more...
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